The Fat Man Speaks

The Fat Man Speaks

by

Emperor Frederick von Seidl

Copyright ©2009

All rights reserved.

"You could lose some weight", " a diet might be something you want to consider", or " gee, are you sure you want to eat that, you know all that weight is bad for you, why don't you have a salad, instead?" is what they would say me over and over.

I wanted to lose the weight, only on my terms, not theirs, after all, I had gained all on my own.   In every fat man there once was a skinny kid.

There was a time that I was extremely skinny.  How skinny?   So much so that, if it had not been for a very crafty U.S. Marine Corps Sergeant at the Armed Forces Induction Center, slipping his foot, unseen, on the back of the scale, I would not have met the minimum weight requirements to enter the Marines and go to Southeast Asia, where they were having a little disagreement over something. I think it was about who ate the last piece of cake but that is only a guess. Anyway, the residents were really mad at each other and us.  And almost everybody there over the age of twelve outweighed me.

In my earlier years, while attending school, I was always picked on, by anybody that was a bully or just a bully in training.  I had, at least, one, usually very lopsided, fight a day.  I usually ended up on the wrong side of winning and faced the humiliations that go along with losing the fight... In fact, I was such a light weight, that on three separate occasions, I was beat up by girls, one through me in to a thorn bush, one pants me, and the worst one picked me up and threw me into the big bicycle rack. On that day, a realization happened, I noticed that they did not do that to the kids with more heft on them. That is when I decided enough was enough and decided to bulk up. 

Well, actually that and the fact that Uncle Sam ask me, ever so nicely, to come over and visit the military for a while.  Such an offer, I could escape the bullies that had taunted my throughout my childhood and all I had to do was face more bullies and death.  Such a deal.

In the Service, although I was not even close to becoming the face on the recruiting poster, my body started to change quickly and I found I had two things now growing, muscles and an appetite. I could run fast, lift heavy, and eat my way though a truckload of food in the very shortest of time and then be hungry half an hour later. It was the birth, although I did not know it at the time, of the Fat Man, entering the world.

While in the Armed Forces, I had served in four branches, I stayed at a very respectable 132 pounds and was considered underweight for my five foot eleven inch frame. But a new hunger, a need to be free of the military, of finding my own path, whether it lead to glory or destruction, gnawed incessantly at my soul. I had to find out what I had been missing.

I left the military and entered the world of civilians, in the small town of San Francisco, California.  It was in that decadent place, that I soon found a taste for all things decadent, from sexual escapades to other risky behaviors, every moral fiber snapped within me, especially the foods I began to indulge in.  Those culinary delights that were guaranteed to make me obese and lead to a heart surgeon on the express train.   Some would call it gluttonous behavior, some did, but for me, I liked the habit and I could not stop when I first decided too.  The world was changing.   People were making money, they were starting to eat healthier, yes starting to eat healthier and looking for someone to put down, and once again I became the target of Bullies.

Oh, they did not beat the daylights out of me now, now they used their words and the weapon of social exclusion. In other words, they called me names, using words like, slovenly, pig and Fat, with a capital F, and any combination thereof. They avoided me in public and I was rarely invited me to their parties, except when they needed my money, fearing I would embarrass them by eating food. I was shunned.

I was an outcast. I stopped socializing, dating, meeting new people, and I took shelter in only one person that I considered safe enough to be around, me. I became a modern hermit, my spirit lay wounded like a soldier on a bloody battlefield, except nobody could see my wound, as laughter was the wall that protected me. Loneliness and boredom became my constant companions, I ate more and I ate badly. Over the years, I gained a lot of weight, until I reach a wild 345 pounds and found that my jean size had become available at the the Big and Tall store only.

I looked in the mirror and asked myself what happened? The Fat Man in the mirror stared for a moment and then called out to me, "I did, what are you going to do about it?" I stared at the fat man in the mirror, and I heard him speak clearly to the being deep inside, the being on this side of the mirror.

Rage and anger erupted and I got mad as all hell. Another bully, another bully in my life to make me miserable, another bully to push me around, well not this time, not this time at all! I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be happy with my body and my life, I wanted to be healthier and happy, and most of all, I did not want one more bully in my life. Enough is enough.

The fat man was going down. I began to look at diets, they failed for the most part, but I wasn't going to let the fat man win. I exercised, I walk five miles a day on the average. I tried the salad thing and found that wasn't the answer.

The answer was always there in plain wrapping, "eat a sensible diet", eat foods that make you full without making you hungry later. I, for example, found that if I wanted to be full and lose weight, I would give up cereal and eat eggs, instead, for breakfast and at night, I eat a handful walnuts before bed.

I didn't measure in a very scientific way but did portion out foods in an easier way, if it is bigger than the palm of my hand, it is to big to eat. Moderation and motivation. That's all it takes. My motivation was standing up against the emotional bullies that were making my life a sad place to be. What's yours?

There are more things, I could tell you, in this article, but the bottom line here, and I do mean the bottom and the thighs, and all the other parts, is that I found the answer that works for me. I did find some of the answers, that I discovered on my own, in magazine articles or items available online, an example would be Strip that Fat. I found what I eat is 80 percent of the battle. It is a slow process but a steady one.

I now weigh 216.6 pounds and am slowly inching, and I do mean inching, my way down to 169 pounds, or as I like to call it, my happy weight, not too heavy as to let the fat man, who hides in wait for each and everyone of us, win and not too light to allow someone to kick sand in my face or throw me into a big bicycle rack.

Emperor Frederick von Seidl is a movie and television producer, screenwriter, author, actor, director, and C.E.O. of the AMERICAN BURLESQUE TROUPE PRODUCTIONS COMPANY.

The American Burlesque Troupe Productions Company Website is http://www.amburlesk.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Emperor_Frederick_Von_Seidl 

Here are few other products that have been very good products that I have come across in the travels over the Internet.  Best Wishes.

Here is a very good book if your journey has you searching for a good way to lose a little weight.  I found it a very good guide.

Thought of the day! 

Remember, it is not polite

 to eat cake with your fingers, 

eat your fingers separately!

It is written (by me):

Eat Foods that will fill you, 

not foods that will kill you!